Love is not something we commonly associate with the hierarchy due to our common misconception of the word. We are so used to the interpretation of love as being romantic between two people of equal status, when in fact love can exist through several different expressions or take different forms, depending on the context. The ancient Greeks first delineated different forms of love, and their classifications and names are still used today by philosophers, psychologists, and even artists.
Agape — Selfless Love
In educated circles, Agape is considered to be the highest form of love, as it asks for nothing in return. It is given without expectation of anything reciprocal other than the warm glow of satisfaction that comes from doing for others. This might sound familiar, as it is the kind of love we regularly find in submissives.
While there is a danger that those who express this form of love may feel reward even when giving Agape to destructive Alphas or in negative situations, under the care of a developer-type Alpha, subs may find ultimate fulfilment through dedicated service.
Agape can be found through any act of service (domestic, worship, sexual, etc.), provided the joy for the giver comes from the selfless act of doing.
Eros — Romantic Love
Romantic, passionate, and sometimes primal, Eros is the form of love we are most common with. Unlike Agape, which is psychological, Eros is a physical expression of love and is often triggered by hormones.
Let’s use a foot-worship session as an example. Agape would be the love to serve, whereas the physical act itself is the expression of Eros love.
Ludus — Playful Love
Ludus is the feelings you have in anticipation of being with someone. The thought of someone’s scent, the previsualization of the acts you will do with them, that rush of excitement, this is Ludus.
In a non-sexual way, Ludus can be the playful banter an Alpha might have with their sub either in text messages before a session or in the casual conversations during aftercare.
A performance by a skilled burlesque dancer is the best example of Ludus in the real world outside of the hierarchy. Within the hierarchy, however, Alphas will often by the ones inspiring Ludus within their subs. It’s the fun in the act of the tease, in the slow lowering of underwear, the wafting of a sock in front of a sub’s nose, in seeing the sub get worked up for what comes next.
Philautia — Self Love
No, we’re not talking about masturbation here. It is the love and value you have for yourself to know your worth. It is the kind of love we hope our members practice when not interacting with other Elysians. It is the love they have to know that they are not worthless and they have a place in the hierarchy, no matter what any Alpha or other sub may say.
To simplify, Philautia is close to what we consider self-care.
Philia — Brotherly Love
Philia is love without Eros (romantic attraction). It is the kind of love you have with close friends and family members which is born of mutual respect, trust, understanding, and concern for each other’s wellbeing.
In the hierarchy, we see Philia expressed in the “brotherhood” among Alphas and among subs. It is the kind of love that is crucial to developing a thriving community. It takes a village to raise a well-trained submissive, as the expression goes.
Pragma — Enduring Love
Pragma is love that develops over a long term. While Eros tends to be the “quick and easy” love, Pragma takes its time before taking root. It is the bonding that comes from deep-seeded connection, and cannot easily come into being over one or two sessions.
Pragma is the culmination of the other expressions of love, as it takes both the self-awareness of Philautia and respect of Philia, and melds them in the lustful fires of Eros. When Agape is added to the mix, such as in a long-term hierarchical dynamic, Pragma is the ultimate goal for many Alphas and subs due to it being the fulfillment of efforts which they have worked towards over a long period of time.
Storge — Familiar Love
Storge is an instinctual love, easily seen in most parent/child dynamics.
Unlike Philia, the power dynamics within Storge are not predicated on balance or equality. In the hierarchy, it is the kind of natural protectiveness an Alpha will have for his sub, and the respect a sub will have for their Alpha/Dom.
Often in the hierarchy, we eschew notions of love and attachment between an Alpha and their sub(s), but the next time someone says that they love you, challenge yourself to identify which aspect of love they mean, and then open yourself up to the different forms that are out there.
This Valentine’s Day, do not close yourself off from love, not even from yourself. Know that you are cared for here in Elysium, and take the opportunity to find a connection as you bask in the light of the prism we call Love.
What forms of love are you most comfortable with? How do you like to express and receive love? Sound off in the comments below or join us on Discord to continue this conversation.
–Alpha Titus
Elysium Lifestyle 